Friday, September 25, 2009

Fuck the asshole who invented the Television

I could've used far worser words but the fact that my mum would be reading this has made me use milder language. Anyway, I do not know who invented the TV, but whoever be it, how I wish I could've strangled him to death. Now, as to why I wish to do that.

There are mainly two reasons. One, it makes people dumber. And two, it leaves people with no family time. Before I proceed further about the case in point, let me tell you what happens in my house everyday. Ammamma and Thatha wake up at about 5.30 in the morning. And the TV is always on except those times when they are asleep or something. Infact, they have changed their sleeping patterns so that they would not miss their beloved TV serials. Not that I'm any better. Whenever Amma wants to talk to me, I am busy watching TV and when I'm jobless, instead of doing something creative, I sleep on the couch and skip the channels half asleep. Screw Radaan Radhika, Balaji Ekta Kapoor and MTV.

I know, I know. We aren't being forced to watch all the stuff they telecast. But no matter how much we vow to ourselves not to watch it, we inevitable waste loads and loads of time watching TV. It is just so human. And when I told my Amma about this, she was like sometimes its useful, especially news channels and Discovery and stuff. That would've been true if the internet wasn't so prevalent. Now we have everything on our monitor screens, be it wildlife documentaries, music videos or for that matter even soaps.

The TV makes all of us dumb. Infact, I'm just reminded of this Steve Jobs line which I read like ages ago- "When you're young, you look at television and think, There's a conspiracy. The networks have conspired to dumb us down. But when you get a little older, you realize that's not true. The networks are in business to give people exactly what they want. That's a far more depressing thought. Conspiracy is optimistic! You can shoot the bastards! We can have a revolution! But the networks are really in business to give people what they want. It's the truth." But I wouldn't agree with Steve that they give us what we want. No. The 'Creative Heads' of all news channels are far more intelligent people than all of us and so they cleverly disguise what they give to be what we want. Anyway, when you are watching TV, you are passive. Not like when you are watching a movie in a theatre. Unless the movie is so very worthless that you'd spare a headache, somewhere deep inside we know that we have paid money to watch it because it looks as if we might like it. So, we are far more active in a theatre than infront of a TV. With the innumerable channels available and newer kinds of shows cropping up all the time, no matter we like it or not, we watch it. Fuck all these miserable urban lives where the only place where a person is confident of his life is on his couch, skipping channels and boozing.

And two,if you can't make out from that anecdote I gave, we, in our family, barely talk to each other unless we are compelled to, lest we miss the programme on TV. Infact I'm really ashamed at the number of times when I yelled at Amma or my girl for the sake of TV. The TV, which at one point of time, was a family member and watching it was a social activity has now eaten up into our families and everyone in the family has their own allocated times and shows to watch. Where is this civilization going?

You may ask me how a computer is any better? True, a computer too is invading into the personal space of people and more often than not it is their one tool to confront the world. But hey, the best part of a computer is that it works on your whims and you can pause anything you are watching. And a computer orders active participation of the user. So, in that way, it is much much better than the goddamn TV.

One day, when I'll have a house and a family of my own, I'll make sure that there would be no TV in the house. I don't want my family to be preoccupied with disgusting reality shows and never-ending soaps. It will make my house a much, much better place to talk, share, bond and live in.

4 comments:

Deekshith Vemuganti said...

mawa......sorry 2 sy this.....but a bit boring ra.....xpected a lot more frm u..

sirish aditya said...

hmm..dunna..wat exactly u mean by boring?..if u lemme knw da parts where it was dry, ill try to improve!

Unknown said...

I beg to differ. That was really well written and executed. Hook, line and sinker.

Anyhoo, this isn't about how you've written but rather what you've written about. I have to say, I completely agree with you.

Television = The Devil Reincarnate.

Since the dawn of time, if there's one thing I remember about my Dad, it's about how he's always pressed that the TV is the "shaitan". It really creeps into your life like a cancer: consuming your thoughts, eroding away at your soul, trapping you within and barricading all possible exists.

Thankfully, I'm rather proud to say that we no longer waste away our lives in front of the TV like couch potatoes. Okay, so we're still the most dysfunctional family out there, but the TV is almost always switched off, save the days when my dad gets into his cricket frenzy or when mom turns it on on account of utter boredom, and even occasionally by my siblings and I when conversation at the dining table turns drafty and dry. But hey, we're only human.

P.S You kind of missed THE MOST crucial downfall of TV: The subliminal messages! No spiel on the dastardly ways of television is complete without a nice, long, anger-ridden passage dedicated to subliminal messages ;)

sirish aditya said...

Holy crap! that comment of yours is so freaking good that people are going to read more of this than my article ;). I have no idea who you are or how you stumbled across this piece but I love your views. Thanks so much for writing all that. And yeah, I have to admit I missed out subliminal messages but to be honest, I had no idea what they meant until I actually just googled them!