MADly in love

Ages since I posted something here. Went to MAD Ice Breaking session yesterday, Rainbow Home for Girls. Had the time of my life. Posted this stuff in MAD Hyderabad's blog. Here it goes.

http://prmadhyd.posterous.com/pursuit-of-happiness-21

--

Pursuit of Happiness

Looking out of the bus window, at the overcast skies, listening to Indian Ocean, I'm nervous. So very nervous. I don't know what its going to be like when I meet those little kids. What should I say to them? What will they think of me? Will I be accepted?

I get down at the bus stop, walk a little and spot the Government school for Girls seconding as the Rainbow home for Girls. I spot Glo, wave at her and as I start walking, two little girls come to me hold my hand and guide me towards her. They ask me what I'm called, "What is your name?" and then tell theirs, Aarti and Sandhya. I see Glo talking to those little kids and am fascinated by how those little girls seem to cling to her. Everybody wants a piece of 'Gloriakka' and once she introduces me to them, same reaction. Little girls, barely 3 feet tall hug me, give me those glorious smiles and soon there are a million shouts of anna, anna allover. Ten minutes later everyone's here, all the volunteers and we start off.

First, it's dividing everyone into 5 groups and me and Sai are in this group called 'Sunflowers'. Lol! Can you actually believe it, Sunflower. Anyway, we are supposed to get organised but nobody seems to be listening to me. Sai tries and she's a little better at it than I am. I mean, she's the Best Teacher and all that. After those lemon in the spoon races and all, things now go completely out of control. Glo, in an attempt to lure kids into listening to her, takes out a bag of balloons. Next moment, you can't spot her amidst all those girls who spring on her. After blowing a zillion buggalu, solving out trifles and in the meantime running around and carrying kids, we eventually get into another ground. There its to time play Current Shock, enacting the train and paper dancing. Lifting a couple o' kids to sit on the parapet wall was my idea and everyone had to pay for it. Everyone wanted to sit on it, and those who were already sitting wanted to get off it. And add to that, Sai's rhythmless Band Bajana. I don't know if I sound like I'm cribbing, but honestly, it was awesome. Nothing like anything I expected.

I've never been held that way. Little kids you've never seen before come running and hug you so hard, that feeling I've never had before. It sounds strange but kids who've been deprived of love for most of their loves, are so generous with it. I've never seen nothing so selfless. All they want in return is sometime to be spent with them, and a little care. At the end of it all, 2 hours just flew away and looking back, I haven't had that feeling in my tummy for a long time. Is is contentment? Is it pride in myself? I think I know what it is. The feeling when somebody hugs with you with all their heart and you look skywards and thank God for everything. It is called Happiness.

The other world

I feel good today. As I sit down to write after a long time. There's the impulse driving me and though it ain't going to be much, it's coming involuntarily. Doing a bit of GRE, playing the guitar, reading quite a lot, meeting new people, life's back on track and I'm pleased with myself.

Went to the MAD PR meeting today. CCD Banjara Hills, can you believe it. Thought I wouldn't go but then just pushed myself into it and am proud of going. I've gained clarity. I was thinking all the way back home about all the MADsters and for a while, my self-esteem went down the trash bin. I mean those folks are awesome. They work in Infosyses, Googles and Oracles and yet they manage to take time for MAD and do all the work. And boy are they good. They know what they're talking about, how to make people listen and work hard for what they believe in.

After a long time, today, I was scared to shit. Of what I'd end up like because looking at some of those people, I realized I wasn't good at anything. My mum always told me that in life it's important to be good at atleast one thing, to be the best there is so that the world looked upto you. And to realise that there are people in the world who are always in pursuit of perfection. I mean probably that is why they say you're supposed to meet new people, go to new places and all that stuff. 'Coz as long as you are a part of a group, you've earned your spot there. People there know what you're about, what's your worth and have an image of you. And that is the reason complacency sets in. You think, all your life, everywhere, you're going to be treated the same way. But what happened today was a wake up call to me. I learnt that there are people in the world better than I am, more competent and ready to work harder.

Aww! That took quite some time to sink in but all the fun is about rising upto it. Alright, off I go then in pursuit of getting better.