As I was walking

30th October, 2009

I was walking through a dark ally. I could faintly hear children yelling with joy though I couldn't actually make out people properly. The sun was completely gone but light still lingered making me follow my faint, elongated shadow. The street lights weren't still on and I was in a trance like state, the effect of alcohol not yet wearing off. I'm walking with my head bowed down, thinking about how screwed up my life is , feeling burdened and oblivious to beings around me. And then, BHAM! There's an explosion next to me and I'm suddenly brought back to my senses. My brain pumps adrenaline all over my body, my heart starts beating faster and I jump away in fear. And then I realise that its diwali and everyone's celebrating. Kids around me start laughing and I involuntarily smile back. I walk now, more conscious of my surroundings when I notice another bomb about 10 feet away. I'm transfixed. The fire at the end of the coil seems to have caught but then it appears that its gone. I sheepishly walk a couple of small steps to look better at it when suddenly I see the spark again. I jump back. I cover my ears and squint. And I wait. It doesn't go off. I walk a little closer again and then I see tiny sparks flying out. I jump back, again. This time I shut my ears, close my eyes, crouch and wait. And wait somemore. The damn bomb doesn't go off. I decide I'm walking past it anyway. I start striding confidently, nervous that it may go off any moment and burdened that I'd be embarrassed infront of all those people. But I make up my mind to walk past it no matter what happens, rather than wait. And it does go off eventually when I'm very close to it but my response is a knowing smile to the kid next to me. As I started walking, something happened to me. The heaviness of expectancy was replaced by the lightness of courage.